I wrote back to let him knew when I was free and then…crickets.I chalked it up to another ghosting, but not without worrying that I did something wrong, like somehow coming off as too desperate or too available in my one-line text about rescheduling.While it’s still hard for me to not take it personally when a guy I know and like does something insensitive, I can let it roll off my back when someone I don’t know does, even when he’s cute and seems interesting.Like a few weeks ago when another Tinder match I hadn’t met yet cancelled a date, promising to reschedule, and I never heard from him again, I didn’t even a shed a tear—or download one meditation app.After being ghosted and dealing with canceled dates, I found myself crying over random dudes.It’s exhausting, but moving past these feelings is a process.
It’s exhausting and depressing to constantly take everything so personally.
In another unicorn of dating experiences, the guy who ghosted me after sex wound up un-ghosting me. He’s divorced and realized that he wasn’t ready to be in a serious relationship yet, and admitted that he had his own patterns he needed to work on, like, for instance, withdrawing.
We talked about what had happened, and he explained why he’d been out of touch. While it was extremely helpful and comforting to hear that from him, I can’t count on this always happening.
Most of the time when guys disappear like that, they’re really just gone for good.
In the absence of reassurance from a man, one day I want to be able to tell myself that it’s not about me—and believe it.
(CNN) -- Online dating seems like the pinnacle of modernity, an online meat market where glassy-eyed humans browse possible suitors, sorted for ease of shopping by size, shape and moral fabric. " Along with this savanna comes permission to do stuff that'd get you a drink in the face I. Sure, online dating could benefit from a protocol overhaul in terms of courtesy, but begging everyone to change the rules this late in the game would be stupid.