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To move forward, it is important that you continue to talk to your husband and try to understand the extent of his difficulties and what the underlying issues are for him.

At the heart of the problem of online “infidelity” is the fact that it is usually done in secret and without the partner’s knowledge – even with infrequent access this secrecy can reduce the intimacy between the couple and can be a first step on the road to bigger betrayals.

When this happens frequently, it can lead to a reduction in their sex-life together, a growing sense of disconnection and an erosion of the marital bond.

An online chat room can be a great outlet and a great source of bipolar support (although adult chat is unwise during manic phases).

Unfortunately however, many of the online chat rooms that promote themselves to bipolar people have other agendas – for example lots of advertising and selling, or adult chat that fuels bipolar symptoms, leading to bipolar mania or even infidelity.

Moving forward In the aftermath of discovering your husband’s online world, it is perfectly understandable that you might feel disgusted and betrayed and to worry as to how much you can trust your husband.

You might benefit from going to counselling especially if you feel traumatised and need to the help of an impartial listener to process some of the feelings.When I challenged him, he was embarrassed and then defensive saying it was just harmless flirting and that he had not gone over any line.

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