I was sabotaging myself in a number of ways that I didn’t even realize…
The longer this goes on, the more you’re becoming convinced more than ever that this whole dating/sex/talking to other people thing is something that do and you’d be better off weighing the pros and cons of a monastic life of quiet desperation and a poetic death via alcoholism interspersed with self-pitying and slightly arch animated gif parades on Tumblr or women being bitches or any number of other things I told myself to explain my failures away.
If, for example, you believe that only “alpha” – for a suitably mistaken definition of “alpha” men get women, then that will be part of your reality.
Not because it’s notice or pay heed to that which confirms your pre-existing belief.
The metaphorical scent of desperation is the antithesis of attraction; much like negativity, it suffuses about you, from the way you speak to the way you act. It screams of low self-esteem and equally low regard for the person on the receiving end of their attentions.
After all, when you’re coming off as desperate, you’re telling the everyone around you that you don’t care for them as a person so much as what they : a featureless mannikin dressed up in entitlement and frustrated desire.
After all, it’s likely that “being yourself” hasn’t exactly gotten you to where you want to be. When we look at people who have something we want – whether it be material success, a skill or talent or even just a hot girlfriend – it’s only natural to try to be more like them.
Whatever they’ve got going for them worked for them… And after all, whatever you’ve been doing hasn’t exactly been working out for you so far.
Nerd Love, even in myself in different aspects of my daily life.
but that doesn’t stop them from trying to force themselves into the model because they Trying to fit into a personality type that’s so diametrically opposed from our real self is like trying to force yourself into shoes that don’t fit; you’re uncomfortable at best and the potential benefits are vastly outweighed by downsides.
When you’re trying to build the life you’ve always dreamed of, you need to do so in a way that’s harmonious with who you , not for who you think you’re should be.
An attitude of “This sucks, this will never work, I’ll never_______, only _____ people get to do _____,” only guarantees that you are indeed correct; it won’t ever work, nor will you ever do whatever it is that you’ve been hoping.
They’re self-limiting beliefs – beliefs that you allow to take over your life and restrict you from achieving what you hope to achieve. When you tell yourself that you will never ________ because only X guys do _______ and you’re not X, you’re artificially cutting yourself off from any and all possibilities.
They could be swapped out for the nearest stranger.